HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!11

Happy Valentine's day! I just decided to bring some happy holiday cheer to this dusk-like room I call my blog.

First, I must notify you that the names, aside from the first person, are altered so that, if I somehow become more prestigious among bloggers, the dear lady's name will not be known. For those of you who can perceive the dear lady's identity, rib injury is not an article insured by CSAM or its few contributors and/or owners. Read at your own risk

Anywho:

me: Jane...
Will you be my valentine?
Jane: *thwack!*
NO
me: I'll die if you don't...
Jane: GOOD!
me: Why not?
Jane: umm
because I want you to die?
me: I can die after you be my valentine...
Jane: but i want you to die now!
me: I WON"T!
Jane: bah.
me: Say yes!
Jane: no
me: ...
Will you be my ghost's Valentine?
Jane: and if you try the "say no!" trick, then it won't work.
nope.
You know what I'll do?
I find some old stale candy hearts
and pelt you with them
me: *goes into a dead swoon*
Jane: will that work?
me: Work meaning what?
Endear you to me mooorre?
Sure.
Jane: no, i meant kill you
me: Oh. No...
I might die of a heart attack if you kissed me, though...
Jane: knives are quieter.
me: I won't slobber.
Jane: only blood
me: Pleeeeeeezzzee?
Jane: NO
oh, wait.
you wanted me to knife you?
turkish dagger ok?
me: *hesitates*
Not really...
Jane: lapland fish scaling knife?
me: But it would be nice to have "Got diced and flayed alive by a marginally gorgeous girl"...
It's almost hard to pass up...
No, by the way.
Jane: dang
what about cyanide/
me: Nah.
Jane: why do you WANT one? (speaking of a Valentine)
go ask lauren
me: She's like twenty decades older than me.
Jane: um..
I'm older htan she is
me: You are?
Jane: no, she's a few months older
not much, though
me: I thought so.
Jane: she acts like she's twenty decades
me: That's the problem. As long as you don't tell me how old you really are, I can continue to dream of us two somewhere dreadfully romantic.
Jane: shut up
me: Will you be my Valentine?
Jane: no
ask lauren
me: Pleeeaaazze?
Jane: no
ask lauren
me: Hmph. I need to go. Dearest.
Jane: i need to go research atomic bombs
SO I CAN BLOW YOU TO BITS
me: Toodles. Good luck, O Felted Peach!


Yep, I'm blissfully in love.