Headers So Far

Whew. Got that crazy thing to format this correctly. Annnywho, as you can probably see, I've gog all the headers for CSAM I've ever posted, and then some. Some of them have very minor changes, others are mind-bendingly different. Enjoy them, but don't expect me to put one up if you ask me. I like stuff more, the newer it is.

Happily,


!Noah!

Memorial Day

I really don't have a lot to say today. Hopefully, though, it'll mean more than the pixels they're projected on for our live veterans. They're one of the greatest reasons I can blog as I do now. They protect our homeland from those who would hurt us. If it weren't for them, through the centuries, brave men and women puting themselves in places where the life to come was merely one hesitation away, a tiny misstep. For those who did die, for the protection of our country, and good around the world, I salute you. I cannot begin to know or describe the amount you have done that allows me to be where I am now. Now that I think about it, we in this generation are likely squandering the treasure they have given us shamefully. We have the greatest liberty of any country on Earth. While we live, let us guard it, let us treasure it, and not sell it for anything. Let us spread it around the world, to countries whose citizens would be awed by the amount we are permitted, nay, encouraged to do.

Our freedom is much more precious than what we can do with it, because of those who died for it. Wasting it is, by extension, wasting the blood of our former countrymen.

God Bless America. (by the way, yes, that is my handwriting in the header now. Kudos to some Wikipedian, also, for the SVG of the flag.)

*UPDATE* For posterity, the Memorial Day banner from yesterday.

!Noah!

The End

No, sadly, I am not going to write a wondrous work of fiction right now. I'm just madly cogitating on the stupidity it would take a human to arrive at this point, near the end of one's Latin studies, and still feel like an entirely miserable student.

For a little background, I started studying Latin early the year before last. I was originally studying at RCA, with Magistra, for those of you who know her. I've been fairly miserable, even for an avid procrastinator, all my life. I feel that part of my abysmal failure to adjust to Magistra's tried and tested system was obviously that. Still, I think I had valid, if devilishly weak, points against that system. I'm not going into it, to spare my memory the trouble.

A week or so later, I got fed up and switched to Miss D's class on SO. (for those of you who are finding these two acronyms totally ambiguous and confusing, I humbly suggest you stop reading before I decide to tell you.) I entered late, but I got in. Now that I think about it, I may have given Miss D. a pleasant surprise. Regardless, I entered. At this try, I was more aware of the money it would cost to exit from the course, and, I hope, put more effort into it. However, my efforts eventually decreased to a point where eighty percent of my translations didn't make sense before class, and, say, ten percent didn't afterwords.

Admittedly, if I were speaking to you face to face, you would see my face redden quite significantly now. I really am rather ashamed of it. My scores, though, have been fairly good. I'd guess my overall score for the whole course is easily higher than eighty percent, and possibly higher than ninty. Still, I feel like I don't even know the language. Really. After having finished the last quiz (not to be confused with the horribly feared exams), I really ought to have a good grip of the language, and actually believe I do. I honestly don't know whether I know the language well, or I know some vocabulary, a declension or two, and some other random stuff. I honestly was looking for more in studying Latin, without, I'm afraid, as a horrible sherking loser, doing the whole four years.

I come to the last exam, feeling unprepared, and, honestly, not really doing much about it. I wish I were, because I feel like I'm not only wasting my own time, my parents' money, and my teacher's time, but just the chance to learn something that will probably be of significant use either in further life, or, possibly included in the latter, fatherhood.

Miserably,


!Noah!

AHERN WEDS BLAKE, THIS TIME IN HIGH-QUALITY YOUTUBE'D QUALITY!

Late last night in the darkest depths of Islasville, John R. Ahern was seen by our late-night watchers, and we quote, "stalking" toward the most prominent church in all Islas. Our team, in turn, "stalked" him, and, upon arriving at the church, set up their video cameras. Within minutes, the event unfolded. Mr. Ahern and Miss Blake were united in holy matrimony last night, sometime between eleven and twelve of the clock, central time. Mr. DenHoed has already attempted to disqualify this high quality, and, we can assure you, entirely authentic recording, saying, reportedly,

"Woah, hold up! I have reason to believe that this has been forged and/or adapted to suit the needs of the posting party."

Also, "Clueless? Dismayed? Distraught? ANGSTY?! BEST MAN?! Pshaw! This is all tom-foolery."

Our regular commentator and well-esteemed enlightener obviously shed some light on the matter.

"Once again, I managed to be at the event. In truth, the coincidence even startles me, to be divinely guided to two weddings for the same man, within the space of a week. In truth, having arrived at two weddings I was not only not invited to, but couldn't possibly have attended, is most remarkable, even for a man such as I. As for Mr. DenHoed's comments...he is clearly been removed from the realm of sanity. Everything in this video, as well as the time, date, etc, etc, etc, confirm it's validity beyond the faintest shade of a doubt. Disproving it would be a more difficult task than to disprove the existence of one's brain. The descriptors used in the video are more than accurate for Mr. Denhoed. Everyone knows that."

UPDATE! NEWLY RETRIEVED: THE ENTIRELY OFFICIAL MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE!

Also, around one this afternoon, John was reported to have said, "...you'd better pack lots of clothes," to a group of Islas girls, referring to the upcomming Islas Gathering. Such implied threats are obviously much more than ungentlemanly.
Mr. Ahern was contacted today, sometime before two O'clock, denying having been married to his exuberant bride, saying, "Thank you, but I'm afraid you have the wrong man. So sorry."
Our team is divided whether to report our president's fairly obvious case of amnesia, or to use, say, a good silver candlestick and see if we can remedy this sad turn of events in one swing.

EDIT: The video chronicling the whole event. Be warned, some parts of this video are more than likely to cause physical injury in the lower torso. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzYC_H7cEU0

Always watching Islas,


!Noah!

AHERN WEDS STARRETT, FORGETS HER NAME AT JUST THE WRONG TIME

Late last night, according to the Defender and the Sophisticator, Mr. Ahern and the illustrious Miss Starrett, alledgedly the fabled Miss Islas, "slunk" out of the Islas capital to a small country village and got hitched. Our frequent commentator and writer happened to be at the event, and watched the whole thing. He noted that few details were more important than when our president said, "I do, Gertrude," to his fine bride. At this, of course, the lass was stunned, and then broke into tears. Accounts dispute this, of course, but we can swear on all the mousepads we have at Headquarters, that this definitely happened last night.
Mr. Bertilson offered further comment upon finding we were about to publish an article.

"It's really sad. Mr. Ahern's been denying his now obvious love for Miss Starrett for much too long. His heart must be a jumble of sad, broken emotions, re-assembled today by this, for him, I suppose, happy occasion. For me, on the other hand, it is not happy. Why? Because I wasn't invited. Sure, I got to see it, but the fact that I got an official PBP mere days ago, and then I wasn't invited to his wedding... I can only conclude that he had some reason for not inviting me. Really. Also, I didn't see Miss Lyss at the wedding. As one of Miss Starrett's best friends and the official matchmaker of Islas, there seems to be no reason why she wasn't invited. It's beyond cruel."

*UPDATE* I just found this on XKCD, so I decided to post it, as it was sooooo appropriate. (NOTE: XKCD isn't really appropriate is mind-numbingly inappropriate in some cases, so, in reading it, be cautious.)


!Noah!

I Hate Windows

For good reason. Let me carefully, exhaustively, and, above all, biasedly set out the many ways in which it torments me.

First and foremost, it's Windows. For those of you who understand this, good. For those of you who don't, it's even more elemental than a hate of someone merely because they exist. It's much less complex, but much more potent.

Second. The idiotic fact that, because it's most popular, most games only run on Windows. If it weren't for games, I would have little or no reason to have Windows on any computer of mine. Ever. I kind of wish I didn't enjoy playing games, but, as I am, I do.

As I speak, I'm scanning my Windows partitions for viruses. For the third, fourth, perhaps fifth time.

Third. The price. I don't need to say more, but I will. Look, I may be a mere teenager, and thus not hugely wealthy, but even so, the most popular operating system should be the cheapest, naturally falling reasonably short of free, of course. Ninty dollars for the cheapest you can get is more than four times what I want to spend on an OS. If it weren't for Linux in general, and Ubuntu in particular, I'd have to spend that outrageous amount of money. Ugh.

Ubuntu, as it is now, is at least as stable as Windows XP, and probably four times more stable than the average Windows Vista installation.

This considered, of course, one wonders why Linux isn't more widely used. Thankfully, many computer manufacturers are now shipping some of their computers with Ubuntu pre-installed, Dell most notably.

Give Microsoft a reason to want your buisiness, and perhaps they'll come up with a satisfactory product. Windows 7? I hope so.

*stalks off in the direction of his Windows partitions, lividly carrying a shotgun*

Obsessively,


!Noah!

BERTILSON GETS PRESIDENTIAL BACK-PAT, IS FLATTERED, STILL ALIVE

This morningish time, John Ahern, president of Islas, gave an official announcement calling for more press agents, and even the reviving of such anti-Ahern agencies as the illustrious Sophisticator and ISLAS periodical. This call was allegedly meant to, "protect the freedom of the press." Our frequent commentator, ranter, and illustrious writer, Noah Bertilson, offered comment mere hours after the announcement.
"I admit I'm fairly flattered to receive an official, certified, and, in all senses, genuine presidential back-slap, but I'm still very annoyed at his horrible forgetfullness, I'm left to guess, considering my execution! The troubles, as I have said before, of having to live, expecting to have been dead a month or two ago, are enormous and overwhelming. Our president seems to have no consideration for the to-be-dead. He could have put poison in my water this morning! Miss Roorda could have chopped my head off any time in the last couple months with such ease as would be unequaled in a Twinkie manufacturing plant! One of my thoughts is that, perhaps our president wants to see me go in style, and has taken this long to prepare. Perhaps, but, nonetheless, I complain. The inconvenience is overwhelming to a degree that would break any other man."

Our team once again left for HQ, having a story of epic proportions once again from our fine, to-be-dead, and, above all, incomprehensible source,


!Noah!

I Haven't Posted in a While

Which is sad. Really. I ought to have something almost daily to indoctrinate you poor souls with, but, for the last week or so, I haven't. I'm sooo evil.

Anywho. I guess I'll have to dig through some deep recess of my mind and try to find something worthy of postage.

...

Well, there is that picture I painted today...so.

No. No, it is not good. *sarcasm*


!Noah!